


Out of Her Shell

by BritHistorian



Category: BLACKPINK (Band)
Genre: F/F, Fanfiction, Meta, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-06
Updated: 2018-03-30
Packaged: 2019-01-09 17:54:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 13,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12281541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BritHistorian/pseuds/BritHistorian
Summary: Lisa discovers Blackpink fanfic online and she falls for fanfic!Jisoo.  Hard.  So she decides to remake Jisoo in the image of fanfiction.





	1. Discovery

Even though Jennie and Jisoo tried telling her not to, Lisa loved reading all the online articles about Blackpink.  She got a thrill out of seeing all the pictures of them and reading the articles people had written.  After all, what's the point of being famous if you don't enjoy it?  And how are you going to enjoy being famous if you don't know you're famous.  She knew there were bad things online too - like all the articles called Kyla from Pristin fat - so far all the things she'd seen written about Blackpink were good.  Lisa had just finished reading "15 Facts You Must Know About Blackpink's Jisoo" - she was happy that all the things were right and proud of herself for already having known all of them - when she decided to scroll down and read the comments.  She almost never read the comments, because there were mean people in the comments and also some of the comments used "internet English" that was hard for her to understand sometimes.  Like this first comment:  "These are great!  People need to be sure to use them in fanfic!"  

"What is fanfic?"  Lisa wondered.  So she went to Naver and looked it up.  There were people writing stories about Blackpink?  She definitely wanted to read some of these!  So she did another Naver search and found a site called fanficsofasia.com.  A quick search at that site turned up hundreds of fanfics about Blackpink!  "Here's one where we're pirates!  Here's one where we run a coffee shop!  Here's one where Jisoo's a professor!  Here's one where I'm spanking Jisoo?!"  That one was so weird she read it twice.

She spent the rest of the day reading fanfics, barely putting down her phone to eat.  She learned what "tags" were and what "ships" were.  "Ships," as it turned out, had nothing to do with boats, but instead was short for "relationships."  Apparently the fans liked to imagine their favorite idols dating each other.  "We might as well," she thought, "since we're not allowed to date anyone else."  She had heard rumors of girls in other bands doing this, but so far as she knew, no one in Blackpink was.  "Or if they are, they're not doing it with me.  And they're extremely good at hiding."  She learned the fans even made nicknames for the "ships" they liked, so they could find the stories they wanted to read.  "Chaennie" was for stories of Rosé and Jennie.  "Jenlisa" was for stories of Jennie and Lisa.  "Chaesoo" was for Rosé and Jisoo.  And like most everyone else reading fanfic, Lisa had a favorite ship:  "Lisoo" - Lisa and Jisoo.  She wished the real Jisoo was more like the Jisoo in the fanfics.  The fanfic Jisoo was sweet and loved everybody - especially Lisa - and she'd spend hours and hours doing things with Lisa.  They hung out and talked and goofed off.  They went to a butler cafe.  They kissed A LOT (and did other things that made Lisa blush just to think of them).  The real Jisoo was always busy, always working, always super serious.  She didn't joke and she didn't hug and she didn't even let Lisa kiss her.  Lisa sighed.  What she wouldn't give for one afternoon with fanfic!Jisoo.

Apparently she'd sighed louder than she thought, because Jennie-unnie came up behind her and ruffled her hair.  "Whatcha doin'?"

"Just reading."  Lisa quickly blanked her phone screen so Jennie wouldn't see what she was reading.

"Reading your celebrity gossip pages again?  Girl, you've got to stop that!  It's just a matter of time before you read something really hurtful on there."

"I'm careful what I read.  And I know which websites like us."

"Okay, but don't say I didn't warn you."  Jennie jumped over the back of the sofa and sat down next to Lisa.  "Anyway, Rosé and I were about to go out for noodles.  Do you want to come with?"

"Sure!  Should I go ask Chichoo?"

Jennie rolled her eyes.  "Don't bother - I already asked her.  She's ordered in chicken again and she's going to stay here and work."

Lisa frowned.  Blackpink wasn't like a band with 4 members.  It was like a band with 3 members and a 4th person who only showed up for practices and performances.

Jennie noticed the maknae's darkening mood and reached over and started tickling her.  "Don't let old sourpuss get you down.  The restaurant we're going to has gamjatang!"  Jennie sang the name of Lisa's favorite food in an enticing way while continuing to tickle the younger girl.  Soon Lisa's naturally bouyant spirit had lifted her mood again and she responded to Jennie's tickling by starting a full-scale ticklefight with her.

The ticklefight was soon interrupted by Rosé asking "Are we going to eat, or are you two going to tickle each other all night.  I'm starved."

Jennie and Lisa stopped, looked at each other, nodded, and jumped over the back of the couch.  Rosé ran from them before they could tickle her, and they chased her out of the apartment.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jennie and Rosé discover Lisa's plan - but they have absolutely no idea what to do with that knowledge.

Another day, another promotional appearance.  Time to go out be charming.  If this was the price they had to pay to get to perform, Jennie would gladly pay it, but sometimes she got tired of it, especially after answering the same question a dozen times.

"Please tell me what's good about the member sitting next to you."

Oh, good.  Jennie liked this question better than "If you were a guy, which one of your bandmates would you date?"  At least with this one you only had to worry about an argument tonight about what you said, not what you said and who you chose to say it about.

Sitting on the far end of the table, Jennie said her piece first, complimenting Jisoo on how well she'd been doing at seeming more at ease in public appearances recently.  She then sat back for a minute to hear what her bandmates had to say.  She wasn't worried about what Rosé, at the other end of the table, would say about her.  But there was no way to predict what Jisoo would say about Lisa or Lisa would say about Rosé.  Either one - Lisa because of her age and Jisoo just because she was Jisoo - was capable of accidentally saying something that would hurt someone, and the audience would never notice because it was framed as a compliment.

Next Jisoo leaned toward the microphone and said "Lisa is so charismatic on the stage, but she’s actually like a little brother, not even a little sister, when not on the stage."

Jennie was stunned.  "WTF Jisoo?" she thought.  "That was a compliment?  It started out well, then you turned and crashed into a wall."

Jennie and Rosé both saw how Lisa deflated under Jisoo's words.  Fortunately, the interviewer didn't seem to have noticed, and Lisa was a trooper, picked herself up and said something nice about Rosé - probably on autopilot, thanks to all their media training.

Thankfully the rest of the interview was without incident, but Jennie wondered what the consequences of Jisoo's words would be once they left the studio.

Over the week after the interview, Jennie and Rosé began to notice a definite difference in Lisa.  She was still the same in performances and practices, always giving 110%, but as soon a they were in downtime, rather than laugh and joke and tease with the others like she'd always done, she was reading something on her phone.  Whatever she was reading, it never seemed to end.  Sometimes she'd be reading it and would look like she was almost crying, other times she was struggling to hold in laughter, other times she'd be reading and then all of a sudden disappear into her room for a while.  Obviously whatever it was was pretty compelling.

In the mornings, Jennie and Lisa were always the first ones up.  Always before Lisa would great Jennie with an excited "Good morning, Jennie-unnie!" and a big hug, but recently Lisa had taken to fixing breakfast with one hand as she held her phone to read with the other, and Jennie got a distracted "Morning" - if that.

It was obvious to Jennie and Rosé that something was wrong, and that whatever it was, it had something to do with whatever Lisa was always reading.  They tried bringing up the problem with Jisoo, to see if she had any insight, but she just dismissed their concerns.

"Oh my god!  Lisa's reading too much!"  Jisoo threw up her hands and lifted her eyebrows as far as they would go, adopting a mock-surprised expression.  "Next thing you know she'll be staying in at night too much!"  Jisoo's face snapped back into its usual businesslike expression.  "Leave the girl alone.  She's working her ass off in rehearsals.  She's probably just finally decided to take all this seriously.  You'd do well to follow her example."

Since Jisoo was obviously no help, Jennie and Rosé knew they'd have to find the solution on their own.  

Jennie and Rosé knew that the key to figuring this whole thing out was to find out what Lisa was constantly reading on her phone.  Asking her was no good - "Oh, just stuff," she'd say, as she quickly hit the home button and then turned off the screen.  Trying to look over her shoulder was no good - she'd taken to sitting in corners and against walls so that they couldn't.  They were at a loss, becoming increasingly desperate, until one evening Lisa left her phone on the table near them when she went to go get a shower.  Rosé quickly picked it up and had just opened the browser when Lisa came out of her room, wrapped in her bathrobe.  "Guys, have you seen my..."  She stopped, midsentence and midstep, when she saw the phone in Rosé's hands.  Before Jennie and Rosé were really conscious of what had happened, Lisa had stormed across the room, snatched the phone out of Rosé's hands, and was looking to see what they had been looking at.  

"Lise, I'm sorry.  I..."

Whatever Rosé would have said next was drowned out by Lisa's outburst.

"Are you happy now?  Are you happy?"

Jennie and Rosé sat frozen on the couch, stunned.  They'd seen Lisa angry before, but this was a lot more than that.  The younger girl was apparently overtaken with some combination of blind fury and crushing despair, shaking with rage and with tears running down her face.

"Well?  Are you fucking happy now?  Yeah, you found out I was reading Blackpink fanfiction.  And you know why?  Because the Blackpink our fans imagine is a thousand times better than the real thing.  They don't spy on each other.  And they're not cold, unfeeling bitches.  And they're not... they're not afraid to go for what they want!"

And with her final words, Lisa turned and ran into her room, slamming the door behind her.  Jennie and Rosé sat silently a moment longer.  They knew that with regular anger the best course was to leave Lisa alone for a couple of hours before trying to talk with her.  This time, it might be best to leave her until morning.

Jennie and Rosé sat in stunned silence for several long minutes.  Finally, Jennie asked "What did you even see?"

Rosé told her "All I had time to see was three words:  Blackpink, fanfiction, and 'lisoo'."

"Lisoo?"

"Yeah.  Any ideas?"

"None.  Look it up.

Rosé picked up her phone and entered the three words in a Naver search.  Jennie and Rosé leaned their heads together and started reading the results.  As soon as they realized what they were reading, they looked at each other across the screen.  They could each tell the other one was wondering the same thing she was:  "What do we tell Jisoo?  Do we tell Jisoo?"

A/N:   Jisoo acually said this in an interview.  You can read the whole interview here:   http://www.yg-life.com/archives/81850?lang=en

Also, the person who requested this fic asked for fluffy Jisoo, but things are going to get darker before they get lighter.  If you stick around, though, things will get lighter and fluffier (I think).


	3. Memory

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which we learn why Jisoo is the way she is.

"Because the Blackpink our fans imagine is a thousand times better than the real thing.  They don't spy on each other.  And they're not cold, unfeeling bitches.  And they're not... they're not afraid to go for what they want!"

From behind the door of her room, Jisoo heard Lisa's outburst, followed by a slamming door.  She dropped the book she'd been reading and leaned her head back against the door.  Tears started running down her face.

"Cold?  Unfeeling?  Oh my beautiful girl, you have no idea..."

When Jisoo was a trainee, she knew that she was different from the other girls.  The other girls were always excited to see the boys when the two groups passed each other going in and out of the cafeteria, but Jisoo never saw the attraction.  Then she met Lily.  Lily was the prettiest girl Jisoo had seen up to that time, and having grown up in Seoul, Lily knew a lot of things that Jisoo didn't.  It was Lily who explained everything.

Or at least as much of everything as she knew - there was still a lot that neither one of them understood.  They knew that the word for what they were was "lesbian," and that it meant a woman who loved other women instead of men, but they still didn't know exactly what lesbians did.  They thought they had plenty of time to figure it out.

One day after dance class, Lily asked Jisoo to be her girlfriend.  Jisoo immediately said yes and gave her a big hug - all the girls were constantly hugging and kissing and holding hands with their friends, so this didn't strike anyone as at all unusual.  After that, the two of them were inseparable, but no one thought anything of it.  They just thought they were another of the pairs of best friends that had formed by this point in the trainee program.

Jisoo was the happiest she had ever been.  She was a trainee at YG, at the top of her class.  She had several close friends in her trainee class and got along well enough with everyone else in the class.  And to top it all off, she had a beautiful girlfriend who loved her.  And just when she thought things couldn't get any better, they did.  One evening at dinner, Lily leaned over and whispered to her "If you're ready, I'd like to come to your room tonight after lights out."  Jisoo nodded and responded that she was ready.

"Okay then," Lily responded.  After dinner, I want you to go do homework or hang out with someone else or something - I want you to be starving for me when you see me later tonight."  Jisoo thought that was the most romantic thing she had ever heard.  She responded that she had a lot of homework so she'd just go do that after dinner.

The time from dinner to lights out had never seemed so long.  Jisoo had time to do her homework and then check it over twice before lights out finally arrived.  She then laid down in her bed, pulled up her blanket, and waited impatiently for Lily to show up.  Just when it could seemed she could wait no longer, her door opened a crack and Lily slipped inside.  She silently closed the door, crept across the room, and climbed into bed with Jisoo.

They wrapped their arms around each other and before either of them had a chance to say a word, Jisoo began kissing the smaller girl with a ferocity neither of them would have guessed that she possessed.  Their mouths explored each other hungrily, as if this would be their only chance.  

When they finally stopped, Jisoo planted a small kiss on the tip of Lily’s nose before saying “I love you.”  This was the first time either of them had said those words to the other, but Lily immediately responded “Love you too.”

They spent almost half the night together, until Lily got a feeling she’d better get back to her own bed before she was discovered out of it.  After one more kiss and one more “I love you,” Lily climbed out of Jisoo’s bed, slipped out the door, and was gone.

The next morning, Lily wasn't at breakfast.  She didn't show up for any of the classes Jisoo shared with her that morning.  She didn't come to lunch or to afternoon classes either.  After her last class of the day, Jisoo went down to the infirmary - no Lily.  

Feeling a wave of panic rising up from the pit of her stomach, she rushed to Lily’s room, which was unlocked.

And open.

And empty.

Jisoo leaned against the doorway, willing herself not to collapse.  Lily must have been caught on her way back to her room last night, and expelled just that quickly.  And the fact that Jisoo was still here could only mean one thing:  That Lily hadn’t told the school whose room she had been visiting.  Jisoo breathed a silent prayer of thanks.

Jisoo walked back to her room as quickly as she could without attracting attention.  Once there, she rushed to get her phone and text Lily.  No response.  She waited.  Dinnertime came.  Even though Lily apparently hadn’t told that she’d been with Jisoo, YG had to suspect something - after all, for the past month, the answer to “Where’s Lily?” had been “Where’s Jisoo?” and vice versa.  Jisoo knew that her only chance of remaining a trainee was to give YG absolutely no reason to kick her out.  She’d been good before, but now she had to be perfect.  And that started with getting up, going to dinner, and eating, no matter how little she wanted to.

For the next several days Jisoo kept herself going by sheer force of will.  She ate though she wasn’t hungry, danced though she had no connection to her body, and sang though she had no feeling for the songs - and she did it all so well that no one suspected.  Every evening she allowed herself one moment of weakness - she’d pull out her phone, check for a text from Lily, and try texting her again.  When the next Sunday came around with still no response, Jisoo decided to try calling Lily.  She tapped the icons on her phone, held it to her ear, and waited.  It rang 3 times, then was answered by a computer voice:  The number you have dialed is no longer available.

Jisoo remembered a conversation she and Lily had had a couple of weeks previously.  They had each promised the other that if one of them failed out of the program, the other one would carry on, because she’d be carrying the dreams of both of them.  And even if they never saw each other again, they would know.  Jisoo had made that promise, and she had meant it, but she had never in a million years imagined she would have to keep it.  Lily must have suspected, though, because she was the one who brought up the topic and insisted on the promise.  “Jisoo,” she’d said, “if I’m not here, you’ve got to keep on without me.  If I failed out, I would want to know that you were still here, still singing and dancing, still chasing our dream.”

Lily’s number had been Jisoo’s only remaining link to her.  With that number gone, Jisoo had no way of reaching her.  She had truly lost Lily, forever.  After hearing the voice repeating “The number you have dialed is no longer available,” Jisoo hung up the phone and deleted Lily’s number from her contacts.  She took all the feelings that she had for Lily and shoved them down where she could never feel them again.  She hated to do it, but it was the only way she could keep her promise to the girl that she loved.  She could go on or she could feel, but there was no way she could do both.

Jisoo’s plan worked.  She stayed in the program, never failed out, and absolutely never got into any sort of trouble that might get her kicked out. Then one spring day it happened:  Jisoo was called in from where she was taking a walk and looking at the flowers and instructed to go to one of the practice rooms.  When she got there, there were 3 other girls there, all waiting for someone.  She had seen them all in passing, but didn’t really know any of them because they were all in different years from her.  There was Jennie and Rosé and . . . Lisa.  When Jisoo saw Lisa, all the emotions she’d been holding down threatened to escape, and it took all the self-control she had to maintain a professional demeanor when part of her wanted no more than to get down on her knees and proclaim her undying devotion to this blonde goddess.  It wasn’t that Lisa reminder her of Lily - the two couldn’t have been more different.  Lisa was taller than Jisoo where Lily had been shorter.  Lisa was lithe where Lily had been curvy.  Lisa wore her hair long where Lily wore hers short.  So it wasn’t that Lisa reminded her of Lily, but somehow Lisa inspired the same feelings in her that Lily had.

But now, having finally reached her goal - yes, reached it, as the four of them were now a band and they had a matter of weeks to prepare to release their first single - Jisoo had no intention of letting her emotions torpedo her now.  She shoved them down and closed them off again and started learning their first song.

Jisoo was surprised to discover that while remembering all these thing she had slid down and was now sitting against her door.  Her tears, however, had continued unabated - her face and the front of her shirt were soaked.

“Oh, Lise,” she said quietly, “I wish I could tell you how much I love you, but I’m afraid if I do you’ll be taken away.  That’s why I put up the walls to keep you out, because I’m afraid if I let you in a little bit, I’ll be unable to stop myself from letting you in all the way.”


	4. 4D Personality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lisa's plans are starting to take effect.

When Lisa woke up the next morning, she knew what she had to do:  She was going to transform Blackpink so that they matched up with the fanfic ideas of them.  So after breakfast, she sat down on the couch, reread some of her favorite fics, and started making a list.

“Jennie:  High fashion.  High maintenance.  Sexy AF.”

“Rosé:  Kind.  Wise.  Caring.  Plays matchmaker sometimes.”

“Lisa:  4D.  Affectionate.  Spontaneous.  Impatient.”

“Jisoo:  4D.  Loves chicken.  Playful.  Loves Lisa.”

That last one was important - there was a fic that Lisa had read where she loved Jennie but Jennie loved Jisoo and Jisoo loved Lisa, while Rosé just sat on the sidelines and watched them all self-destruct.  Lisa did not want to live in that fic.  Then there were all the Jensoo and Chaesoo fics.  Lisa didn't want to live in those either.

So lets see:  Jennie was already pretty much living the role the fic writers had set for her.  Lisa could do her part.  That left Rosé and Jisoo to be brought into line.  The impatient part of Lisa wanted to go straight to working on Jisoo, but that last quality of Rosé’s could be pretty useful.  “A matchmaker...” she mumbled to herself.

Lisa looked up and saw all her bandmates sitting around their living room, each engaged in their own tasks, waiting for the car to arrive to take them to that day’s events.  “Hey Rosé,” she asked, “if you found out that one of your friends had a crush on another one of your friends, would you ever try to play matchmaker.”

Rosé thought for a moment.  “Maybe...  It depends on whether or not I think they’d be good for each other.  Why?”

“Oh, no reason.  Just wondering.”  Lisa knew her attempt at nonchalance wasn’t entirely believed - or possibly not even believed at all - but she knew better than to announce her whole plan up front.

The first item on the day’s agenda was another radio interview.  Lisa knew Jisoo hated these - she’d wished once that they could just record one interview and send it to all the different radio stations, since they’d get asked the pretty much the same questions each time anyway.

Lisa generally enjoyed radio interviews, and today she was trying extra hard:  Joking with the interviewer, giving silly answers, and just generally being 4D.  If it was possible to break down the wall that Jisoo had built around herself, Lisa was going to find a way to do it.

“If you were a man, which one of your bandmates would you date?”

Just as Lisa knew that Jisoo hated radio interviews, she knew that Jennie and Rosé hated this particular question and would try to get out of it with as little fuss as possible.  Sure enough, Jennie picked Rosé, Rosé picked Jennie, and they both gave carefully considered answers designed to praise their choice without disparaging their bandmates who they didn’t select.  

Then it was Lisa’s turn.  “Based on the guys I know” - this was a lie, she didn’t know any guys - “if I was a guy, I’d be trying to date Momo from Twice.  I mean, come on, have you seen her legs?”  Lisa waited, letting the tension build until it looked like everyone’s eyes couldn’t get any bigger.  “No, I’m just kidding with you.  If I was a guy, I’d want to date Jisoo.  Because she tries to be all serious and proper, but I bet underneath that she’s got a totally 4D personality, and if you could get the inner Jisoo to come out and play it would totally be worth it.”

They never found out how Jisoo would have answered that question, because she was so stunned with Lisa’s answer that she was totally speechless.  The interviewer had to play a song, then go to commercial, then go on to the next question in order to get things going again.

That evening, after a TV interview, a signing event, and a dance practice, they were back in their apartment, getting ready to watch a movie before bed.  Jisoo was sitting in the big armchair next to the couch.  Rosé was sitting on one end of the couch and Jennie was lying down with her head in Rosé’s lap so that Rosé could play with her hair.  Normally Lisa would sit on the other end of the couch but tonight she decided to do something different.  She climbed in the armchair next to Jisoo, rested her head on Jisoo’s shoulder, and wrapped her arms around her waist.  It didn’t take long before Jisoo started wiggling.  Lisa let her wriggle loose a little bit, then started cuddling her again.  After a while of this, Jisoo couldn’t handle any more; she got up and headed for her room.

“I’m too tired to watch the rest of the movie.  I’ll see you all tomorrow.”

“Chichu, don’t be mad!”  Lisa pulled out every bit of aegyo she’d learned.  “Come back and watch the movie with me, Chichu!  I’ll be too scared to watch it without you!  Please, Chichu?”

Rosé and Jennie both turned their attention from the movie to Jisoo.  Was she really going to leave after all that?

The answer, apparently, was yes.  She turned on her heel, stalked off to her room, and shut the door. 

Jennie sat up, making a space for Lisa between herself and Rosé.  “You can some sit over here, Lise.  We’ll keep you from being scared.”

Lisa looked over at her.  “You’re just feeling guilty for going through my phone last night.”

“Well, yes,” Jennie admitted.  “But you’re not supposed to say that.  You’re supposed to come over here and let us cuddle you and braid your hair in pigtails.”

“I suppose I could do that,” Lisa said, coming over to sit on the couch.

Between the cuddling and the hair braiding and the occasional tickle-fights, they didn’t actually see much of the rest of the movie, but it was still a fun evening.  On her way to her room after the movie ended, Lisa stopped by Jisoo’s room, opened the door a crack and called in “Chichu, I’m sorry I drove you away tonight.  I just wanted you to have fun with me.  You’re always so serious.”

After she left, Jisoo continue to lie in her bed awake, thinking how much she wished she could have stayed out with Lisa.  She hadn’t been able to sleep, so she had just lain there listening to the others have fun.  Every giggle from Lisa was like a dagger through her heart.

The next day was a day off.  When Jisoo finally woke up, she saw that Lisa was doing her laundry, Rosé was sitting on the couch drawing, and Jennie had gone out.  Jisoo put on her shoes and headed out for a walk.  At first she was just taking turns at random, not really caring where she went so long as she was out of the apartment, not really paying attention to her surrounding so much as her thoughts.  Then she noticed that her path had ended her up at their manager’s office and she knew what she had to do.  

She’d go talk to Ms Lee, ask to be moved to a different group or to become a solo artist.  She had to get away from Lisa before she ruined everything for both of them.

Of course, Ms Lee had heard about Lily, suspected why Jisoo was there, and was determined to keep the group together even if it meant saving Jisoo from herself.

“Jisoo!”  She said, showing her into her office and giving her a bottle of water.  “So glad you came by - saves me from having to come by your apartment to talk to you.”

Jisoo blanched.  “Am I in trouble?”

She laughed.  “Why is that always your first thought?  Have you done something you should get in trouble for?  No, don’t answer that - if you have, I don’t want to know.  Anyway, I was coming to tell you that the fans ate up your interview yesterday morning.  It’s been the most shared, most commented interview you girls have ever done.  People loved Lisa’s answer to the ‘who would you date’ question.  They’ve been turning it into memes!”

She held up his tablet so that Jisoo could see.  There was a picture of Lisa with the caption “Says she wants Momo, really wants Jisoo.”  Next there was a picture of Jisoo, looking her most serious, captioned simply “4D.”  Last was a picture of Momo looking aegyo and sad, captioned “Hey, I’m 4D too!”

    

“Like I said,” Ms Lee continued, putting the tablet away, “the fans are eating it up, which means we’ve got to play into it.  You and Lisa are going to be roommates on the Australia tour next week.  And until further notice, I don’t want one of you appearing in public without the other.  At all.  Ever.  Do I make myself clear?”

Jisoo nodded, knowing there was no point in even bringing up leaving the group.

Ms Lee looked closely at Jisoo.  “Well, I’ve just been rambling on here, but surely you had some reason for coming by.  Was there something in particular you wanted to talk about?”

Jisoo shook her head.  “No.   I was just out for a walk and thought I’d drop in and say hi.”

“OK then.  Well, I’ve got to get back to work, and you’ve got to get back to your apartment so you don’t get seen out without Lisa.  Remember, I want you two joined at the hip - I’ll call and give her the instructions too.  And if she’s wrong and you don’t have a hidden 4D side, you’d better start learning to pretend you have one.”

Jisoo took her bottle of water and headed back to the apartment, her steps slower than they’d been coming out.  What was she going to do now?  She started trying to balance the water bottle on her shoulder, feeling a small feeling of victory when she managed to do it.  It kept her mind off Lisa for a second, and it might even qualify as 4D.


	5. Confirmation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lisa breaks through Jisoo's defenses

“C’mon Jichoo!  I need to get some makeup for the Australia tour and Ms. Lee said I can’t go to the store without you!”

Jisoo really didn’t want to go to the store, but she also knew a losing battle when she saw one.  If Jisoo didn’t say yes now, Lisa would just pull out stronger and stronger forms of aegyo until eventually Jisoo had to say yes.  It was easier to just give in now.  Besides, it had been a week since Jisoo had seen anywhere but their apartment and their practice room and she was starting to get stir crazy.

“Fine, let me grab my purse.”

“Oh, thank you Jichoo!”  Lisa jumped up and wrapped her arms and legs around Jisoo in an excited hug.  Unfortunately, Jisoo wasn’t expecting this, so the best she was able to do was to steer their fall so that they landed on the sofa instead of the floor.  In the process, she whacked her head on Lisa’s shoulder, hard.

“Oh, Jichoo!  Are you okay?”  She leaned down and planted a kiss on Jisoo’s forehead.  “I’m sorry Jichoo!  I didn’t mean to hurt you!”

To the same degree she had been excited and rambunctious just a moment before, Lisa now was still and contrite.  Jisoo had never seen someone whose moods could change as readily as Lisa’s.

“I’ll be fine,” Jisoo said, trying to distract herself from how pleasant it felt to have Lisa lying on top of her.  “Just let me up so we can go to the store.”

Lisa climbed off Jisoo, then reached out her hand to help the older girl to her feet.  Jennie happened to come in right at that moment.  “Another casualty of Hurricane Lisa?” she asked.

“Something like that,” Jisoo responded, chuckling weakly.

“Don’t listen to her,” Lisa said.  “She just doesn’t know how to receive a hug.”

“With your hugs, the best way is ‘while wearing pads and a helmet.’”  Jennie laughed, and after a moment Lisa joined in as well.  Not wanting to be obviously not part of what was going on, Jisoo faked joining in, and in short order was surprised to discover she was actually laughing.  It felt good.

******

Five hours later they were finally home from shopping.  Jisoo, unprepared for the adventure that was shopping with Lisa, collapsed into the first chair she happened across, dropping her bags on the floor.

Rosé didn’t even look away from the screen where she was playing League of Legends.  “Only five hours?  She let you off easy.”

Jisoo looked at her in disbelief.  “Easy?  We had to try on all the makeup.  Literally all.  We had to get makeovers.  We had to get our colors done.  We had to get our colors done again because she didn’t like the answers the first woman gave us.  We had to eat soft pretzels.  We had to get makeovers again.  We had to try an exfoliating scrub with microbeads.  We had to go get our makeovers redone because the exfoliating scrub took off our makeup.  Then we got our nails done, then we bought our makeup, and I’m sure there was something else that I’m forgetting.  I don’t think anyone has ever shopped as thoroughly as we did today.”

Lisa, standing right behind Jisoo’s chair, said “You know I can hear you, right?  Anyway, we’re home early for a reason - go wash your face, I’m going to do your makeup on Vlive.”

“Do I have to?”

Lisa dropped her bags behind the chair, then came around, grabbed Jisoo’s hands and started pulling her up.  “Yes, you have to, you big baby.  You haven’t been on Vlive since Tuesday, you can’t go on without me, and the Blinks miss you.  Jennie tried to do a Vlive last night and could barely say anything because they kept asking ‘Where’s Jisoo?’  They love you.”

As Jisoo let Lisa pull her up, she could have sworn she heard her quietly say “I love you,” but she knew she was just imagining things.

******

Once Lisa had scrubbed Jisoo’s face the cleanest it had ever been in her entire life, she gathered up an assortment of makeup - Jisoo was quite certain it was more products than it was possible to put on one face at one time - and led her to the Vlive camera.  Lisa put the makeup on the table in front of them and they sat down and got comfortable.

“Are you ready?” Lisa asked.

“I think so?” Jisoo replied cautiously.

“Only think so?  Then you need some tickles!”  Lisa reached out and started tickling her ribs, making her laugh too hard to tickle back.  Jisoo tried leaning back away from her, then leaned too far back and started toppling over.  She grabbed Lisa’s wrist to try to arrest her fall, but she had too much momentum - all she ended up doing was pulling Lisa down on the floor next to her.  And the whole time Lisa never stopped tickling and never stopped laughing.

“Now are you ready?” Lisa asked, when she finally gave Jisoo a chance to catch her breath.

In between residual bouts of giggling, Jisoo was finally able to say “Yes.”

“I’m so glad I turned on the camera before I started tickling you.”

Jisoo jumped up, fumbling around for the camera control.  “You didn’t.”

Lisa rolled on the floor laughing.  “No, I didn’t.  But it would’ve been funny if I had.”

Twenty minutes, three ticklefights, and one round of knocking everything off the table later, they were finally ready to start their VLive.

Lisa waved at the camera.  “Annyeong, Blinks!  Konnichi wa!  Hello!”

Jisoo waved.  “Annyeong!”

“Today Chichoo and I went shopping and got makeup for our trip to Australia next week.  And now I’m going to show her - and you - how to put it on.”  She leaned conspiratorially toward the camera and mock-whispered, “Because she’s terrible at it.”

“I can hear you!”  Jisoo responded, reaching out to tickle Lisa again.

Quickly Lisa snatched up a bottle of foundation.  “No-no-no!  You can’t tickle the person who’s holding the makeup!  That’s the rule.”

“Since when?”

“It’s just the rule.  Isn’t it, Blinks?”

The screen started filling with their responses.  “It’s a rule!”  “No tickling the maker-upper!”  “Jichoo noooo tickles”  “Jisoo speak English”  “Tickle her Jisoo!!!!”  “Jisoo doesn’t speak English, everyone knows that.”

“See?”  Lisa said.  “Almost all of them know it’s the rule.  Now let’s get started.”

Lisa began by contouring Jisoo’s face - half a dozen different shades of foundation, applied just so and then blended.  Lisa always paid careful attention to what the makeup artists did to them whenever they were on television, and she applied everything she knew to Jisoo’s face.  She then started eye makeup, then cheeks, then concealer on a couple of spots, then the lips, which required 4 or 5 - Jisoo lost count - different products.

“And there you have it!”  Lisa said, finishing Jisoo’s lips with a flourish.  “And the best part is, if you do the lips like I just showed you” - she quickly leaned forward and planted a kiss squarely on Jisoo’s mouth - “it won’t even kiss off.”

Jisoo looked stunned.  She turned to the camera, said “Annyeong!  Bye bye!” and quickly turned it off.  Turning to Lisa, she said “Thanks Lise.  I’ve gotta go now” and jumped up and ran for her room.  Lisa could swear she saw her eyes shimmering as she got up.

******

Jisoo ran into her room and slammed the door behind her.  She came to a sudden stop when she saw herself in the mirror.  Lisa really had done an amazing job of her makeup - she looked like the best possible version of herself.  She reached up and touched her lips - she could still feel Lisa’s kiss.   Tears started welling up in her eyes.  Before she fully realized what was going on, tears were spilling over, running down her cheeks.  She collapsed to the floor, crying so hard it was as if she was trying to get out every tear she’d choked back, right now.  She was crying so hard she didn’t see or hear Lisa come into the room behind her.

******

Lisa didn’t know what was up with Jisoo, but she knew something wasn’t right and that she ought to follow her and make sure she was okay.  She rushed into Jisoo’s room just in time to see her collapse in tears on the floor.  In an instant she was by her side, holding her tightly, rocking her back and forth, and making soothing noises.

“It’ll be okay,” she kept repeating.  “I don’t know what’s wrong, but I’m here with you and it’ll be okay.”

“No,” Jisoo shrieked, pushing Lisa away from her.  “It won’t be okay.  None of it!  I can’t let it happen because it won’t be okay!”

“What can’t happen?  What won’t be okay?”  Lisa reached out and took hold of Jisoo’s hand.  “Tell me what won’t be okay, and together we can figure out how to make it okay.”

And as if the last outburst had taken the last bit of resistance she had, Lisoo did tell her.  She told her about her experiences as a trainee, about Lily being expelled and Jisoo losing her forever.  Then she told Lisa about how she’d felt about her since she first saw her.

“And so,” she concluded, “I’d rather have you around and not be able to be with you than be with you and then have you taken away.”

Lisa pulled Jisoo into a hug, this time with no resistance.  “But wouldn’t it be even better,” she said, “if you could be with me and not have me taken away?”  She pulled back and lifted Jisoo’s face so she could look into her eyes.  “You’re not a trainee anymore.  Even though YG still has a lot of control, you’ve got a lot more control now than you did then.  And besides,” she added, smiling, “on some level they obviously like the idea of us being together or else Ms Lee wouldn’t have stuck us together like this.  They don’t need to know if we decide to take things beyond the level of playing for the fans.”

Jisoo stared deep into Lisa’s eyes, unable to believe this was real.  “Is this really happening?” she asked.  “Am I dreaming this?”

Lisa leaned forward and kissed Jisoo, longer and softer than the kiss for the camera.  “Does that feel like a dream to you?”

Jisoo sighed.  “It does.  And I hope I never wake up.”

******

The next morning Jennie and Rosé pretended not to not to notice that Lisa came out of Jisoo’s room when she woke up, or that she looked almost indecently happy, or that she and Jisoo were still wearing their clothes from the day before.

*Ping!*

Jennie picked up her phone.  It’s a message from Ms Lee:  “Look at the response to last night’s VLive.  Tell Jisoo and Lisa to keep it up.  They’ll know what I mean.”  Jennie raised an eyebrow as she looked back and forth between Lisa and Jisoo and then, when neither of them volunteered anything, turned back to her phone.

“Wow!  The Blinks are losing their minds:  ‘OMG did you see that?’, ‘Lisoo slays all other ships!’, ‘Eat that Jenlisa shippers!’, ‘TOLD YOU Lisoo was real!’ - whatever you two did yesterday, you made an impression.”

Jisoo and Lisa just smiled at each other and kept eating their breakfast.

“Well,” Jennie continued, “you need to go get packed for Australia - the car will be here to get us in an hour and a half.  I’m going to go watch that VLive.”

“Wait a second,” Rosé said, rushing to clear up her dishes, “I want to see it too.”

Under the table, Lisa took Jisoo’s hand.


	6. Travel day

Jisoo hated airports. She loved flying. But airports? With all the lines, and the crush of people, and the constant announcements on the overhead speakers that you could barely figure out what they were saying? If there was a way to fly that didn’t involve going to an airport first, Jisoo would take it in a heartbeat. Because airports were so tough for Jisoo to handle, the others had set up some system that they never told her about where they’d take turns being her airport buddy and helping her get through to her seat. She didn’t know how they did it, but they always managed to pick the one who helped her in the way she most needed to be helped that day. Rosé was always caring and sympathized with Jisoo’s situation, listening to her fears and laying them to rest. Jennie was brash. She threw her head up and her shoulders back and strode through the airport, daring anyone to impede her progress, carrying Jisoo along in her wake. And Lisa - airport days with Lisa were the best of all. Lisa told silly jokes and made up games for them to play, and actually made going to the airport fun. But, of course, that was before everything changed. She hoped Rosé was her airport buddy today - she felt like she could use a little TLC.

“Hey Chichoo!” Lisa exclaimed as they put their bags in the back of the van for the ride to the airport. “Guess who’s your airport buddy today!”

“Yay, airport!” Jisoo tried to fake being brave, but inside she just wanted to crawl in a hole. Here she was, dating the most wonderful woman in the world, and she couldn’t even get through an airport by herself. Sooner or later, Lisa was going to get tired of it, figure out that she deserved better, and that would be the end of Lisoo. She wasn’t sure if she hoped that day would come quickly, in hopes that it would hurt less if it came soon, or if she should hope it was as far as possible in the future, so she’d have more time to build up her store of memories of time with Lisa. Memories that would have to last her the rest of her life.

Jisoo got into the van and waited for the others to finish stowing their luggage and join her. She pulled her hat down a little further over her ears, and wished that the glasses she was wearing were sunglasses so that she could hide behind them better. If the others noticed that Jisoo was being quieter than usual, they just chalked it up to her usual pre-airport jitters. She was glad that none of them asked what was wrong, because then she’d have to lie and say “nothing” - she couldn’t tell the truth about this will Lisa was sitting in the seat next to her, bubbling over with excitement. And the others could always tell when she was lying, so they’d start pushing her for the truth, and either she’d tell it and ruin Lisa’s day or she wouldn’t tell it and ruin everyone’s day. She made a mental note to try to talk to Rosé about this as soon as they could get a little privacy, but until then, she just concentrated on being as small and unobtrusive as possible.

******

They got to the airport, checked their bags, and headed for their gate. Unfortunately, Jisoo was only about 4 steps in when she made a huge mistake - she stopped for just a moment and looked around. Just that quickly, the other three were swallowed by the crowds. Jisoo looked around frantically. Was that Jennie? Was that Lisa? Or was that Lisa over there? That was Rosé, right? Everywhere she looked she saw someone that looked like one of her friends, but none of them actually were. And since they were counting on Jisoo having her airport buddy, they hadn’t even told her the flight number or what gate they were leaving from or anything. And even if she had known, it wouldn’t have mattered because her feet were frozen in place.

Just then Lisa came rushing through the crowds toward her, almost at a full run. “Jichoo! I lost you for a second there.”

Jisoo chuckled weakly. “Yeah, I stopped to look around for a second and just that quick - poof! - you all disappeared into the crowds.”

“Well,” Lisa said decisively as she skidded to a stop in front of Jisoo, “let’s don’t let that happen again.” Her voice became a little quieter, just barely audible. “And let’s not let Jennie find out about this. I already feel bad enough about losing you, I don’t need to add on her being pissed at me about it.”

Not trusting her voice, Jisoo nodded and took the arm that Lisa offered, clinging to the sleeve of the taller girl’s denim jacket like a drowning woman would clutch at a rope. She didn’t want to get lost again, especially not if Lisa would get in trouble because of it.

Lisa guided Jisoo through the various security checkpoints and to their gate. Once there, she established Jisoo in a chair and went to a kiosk nearby to buy them bottles of flavored water. When Lisa returned with the water, she kept Jisoo occupied with various balancing challenges until it was time to board their plane.

When they got in line for their seats, Jennie asked everyone what seat they were in. They each read off their seat numbers and she thought about it for about half a second before she started ordering everyone around. “No, that’ll never do. Lisa, switch seats with Jisoo. Rosé, switch seats with Lisa. No, that’s still not right. Jisoo, you and Lisa switch places. And Rosé, switch seats with me. There’s now everything’s the way it’s supposed to be.” Jennie was in the window seat on the left, with Rosé next to her, then the aisle, then Jisoo, then Lisa in the window seat on the right.

******

They were almost 6 hours into an 11 hour flight and all starting to get tired of being on the plane. Jennie was under headphones, watching a Mean Girls (again!). Lisa had fallen asleep, Jisoo was just sitting there thinking, and Rosé had just pulled out her phone to see what was going on online.

“Wow,” she said to Jisoo, startling her out of whatever thoughts she’d been having. “BLINKs don’t waste any time - pictures of us from the airport have already been made into memes.”

“Really?” After seeing how quickly the fans jumped on any new picture or video of them, Jisoo didn’t know why she was surprised by this.

Rosé held out her phone. There was a picture, taken from behind, of Jisoo balancing her bottle of water on her head and Lisa’s bottle on her shoulder. The caption read “Who needs a table when you’re this 4D?”

Jisoo wasn’t sure how she felt about this, but she didn’t have time to think about it because Rosé pressed the phone into her hands. “That’s not the only one. Look at the 2 pictures before it.”

The previous picture showed Jisoo clinging to Lisa’s sleeve, with the caption “It’s dangerous to go alone...” The fans already knew about Jisoo’s fear of airports, and she thought a Legend of Zelda reference was as good a way as any for them to poke a little harmless fun at it. It certainly beat the times that people online were mean about it.

The picture before that literally took Jisoo’s breath away. It showed Lisa looking at the camera, smiling her beautiful smile, with Jisoo on the far side of her holding her sleeve. The caption read “I’ve got my girl!”

Jisoo was still stunned into silence as she handed the phone back.

“I know right?” Rosé was as bright and bubbly as ever, either oblivious to or deliberately ignoring Jisoo’s stunned silence. “I hope YG is okay with you and Lisa, because the BLINKs have embraced the two of you whole-heartedly. #LisooIsReal has been trending on Twitter ever since the pictures from the airport were released.”

Jisoo blinked slowly as she tried to take in this new information. “Rosé,” she asked, “can we talk for a minute?”

“What do you think we’re doing right now, silly?” Then Rosé noticed how serious Jisoo’s face was and switched moods in an instant. “Sure we can talk. What’s wrong?”

Jisoo looked around to be sure Lisa was still asleep and Jennie was still engrossed in her movie.

“I’m scared.”

Rosé looked confused. “About what? The airport was almost 6 hours ago, and it’s 5 hours until we have to go through the airport in Australia, and that’ll be a breeze because it’s always easier to get out of an airport than into it, and you’re not scared of the airport this time . . .” Rosé’s thoughts wound down and she looked more confused than ever.

“No, I’m scared of being scared of the airport?”

Rosé put her hand to her forehead as if the very idea was giving her a headache. “What? You’re what the what of what? Explain.”

“I’m so helpless in airports. I can’t do anything without my buddy. And if Lisa and I stay together, eventually we’re going to go somewhere just the two of us, and she’ll have to be my airport buddy the whole time, and she’ll get tired of it and decide she deserves someone who can walk herself through an airport like a normal person and she’ll leave me.”

Rosé scoffed, as if this was the most preposterous thing she had ever heard. “After everything she went through to get the two of you together, do you really think she’d leave you over a phobia that you can’t help? And that she knew about before getting involved with you?”

“Yeah, but . . .”

“But nothing.” Rosé’s face got fierce. “Anyone with half a brain should wish they had someone who loves them half as much as that girl loves you. I hope someday I find someone who loves me that much. Did you know that before you two got together, she just about bit Jennie’s head off because Jennie dared to suggest there was a chance that you two weren’t destined to be together? I don’t think there’s anything - or anyone - in the world who could make her give you up, so stop worrying. Why don’t you try to get some sleep. I’m sure everything will look better once we get to the hotel.

“OK. Thanks.” Jisoo smiled weakly at Rosé, then turned back to look at Lisa again. As Jisoo was about to close her eyes and try to sleep, she heard Lisa start talking softly and strained to make out what she was saying.

“Tella chick’ns J’soo’s not gonna hurt’em . . . Zat so? . . . Imma showdose chick’ns who’s boss . . . Leggo my arm!”

Jisoo reached over and shook Lisa awake. “Lisa, wake up! You’re talking in your sleep and it sounds like you’re having a nightmare!”

Lisa stayed resolutely asleep, her head rolling over to her other shoulder as she said “Not gonna letda chick’ns hurt J’soo.”

Jisoo felt tears well up in her eyes. Even in her sleep, Lisa was protecting her. It made her feel bad that she had to rely on her maknae for protection, but she felt good that Lisa seemed to want the role.

******

As Rose had predicted, the airport in Australia was easier to get out of than the one in Seoul had been to get into. A short shuttle bus ride later and they were at their hotel. Usually Ms Lee was able to get them adjoining rooms when they were traveling, but this time she apparently hadn’t even been able to get them on the same floor. Jennie and Rosé were on the 7th floor, while Jisoo and Lisa were on the 5th.

“Okay everyone,” Jennie said, naturally slipping into her leader role. “Let’s go up to our rooms, drop off our luggage, freshen up, and meet back her in 15 minutes to go find some dinner.”

“Sounds good, boss,” Lisa said with a laugh. Even though Jennie was the closest think Blackpink had to a leader, she hated when any of the others brought up that fact. Somehow, though, Lisa was able to get away with calling Jennie “boss” whenever she started taking charge. Jisoo and Rosé had discussed it, and they weren’t sure if it was because of her sense of humor or because she was the maknae. Either way, they both knew better than to try it.

“Fifteen minutes,” Jennie repeated, as they all headed for the elevator.

As soon as they walked into their room, Jisoo stopped short, almost causing Lisa to run into her. There had been some mistake - this room only had one huge bed! Lisa was about to bounce on the bed when Jisoo stopped her.

“No, Lise. They’ve made a mistake with our room. You’ll need to call the front desk - the clerk only spoke English.” Jisoo hated being dependent on Lisa for this as well, and mentally promised to work twice as hard on her English lessons when they got home.

Lisa put the phone on speaker so that Jisoo could her the conversation too.

“G’day room 532. Do I have the pleasure of addressing Ms. Kim or Ms. Manononobanon...”

Lisa rolled her eyes. What was it about white people? Were they just genetically incapable of pronouncing Thai names?

“This is Ms. Manoban. Just call me Lisa, it’ll be easier.”

“All right Ms. Lisa. What can I do for you?”

The clerk’s Australian accent was so thick it took Jisoo a moment to figure out he had said “All right,” because it sounded more like “Awe-roit.” She was now even more glad that Lisa was handling this call.

“Well, there appears to have been a mistake in our reservation. We’ve got a room here with one king bed instead of 2 double beds.”

“All right, let me just pull you up in the computer . . . it’ll just take a second here . . . Ah! There’s a note here from Ms. Lee - that’d be your manager, right? - When she made the reservation she said ‘Tell the girls this isn’t a mistake and that I said to enjoy their time in Australia.’ So there you are, no mistake at all. Have a good night, miss.”

Lisa and Jisoo looked at each other and jumped on the bed, rolling around laughing. Suddenly Jisoo grabbed Lisa and began planting kisses all over her face, causing the younger girl to laugh even harder until she was gasping for breath. When she finally stopped, Lisa managed to catch her breath and said “We’ll have more time for that tonight. Right now we’d better get downstairs - fifteen minutes is - “ she looked at her phone - “WAS 10 minutes ago.”

They grabbed their purses and rushed back to the elevator. As they were waiting for it to arrive, Jisoo said, “Well, Jennie and Rosé are okay with us. The BLINKs are okay with us. Now we know Ms. Lee is okay with us. I just hope YG is okay with us.”

Jennie leaned down to kiss Jisoo. “They’d better be, or they’ll have me to deal with.”


	7. Chapter 7

The Australian “tour” went about as well as expected. Jennie rebelled at calling a series of 3 shows at medium-sized local clubs a tour, but Ms Lee insisted. The crowds were actually slightly larger than expected, even if the fraction of them that was actually in the club to hear Blackpink (as opposed to just because it’s their regular club), was maddening small. Still, they got applause at the end of each song and they sold out all their fansignings, so they had to call the tour a success, no matter what else happened. (Even a couple of days after the second show, Rosé was still sore after losing some hair due “Boombayah” thanks to a splintery spot on the stage. And Ms Lee had already called and yelled at the owner of the third club after Lisa almost fell into the audience during “As If It’s Your Last” thanks to be stage being almost a foot shallower than promised.)

As their van took them to the airport to return home, they happened to pass by the first club and saw a van out front indicating carpenters were at work inside.

“Looks like Ms Lee yelling at them worked miracles,” Lisa said.

Jennie laughed. “Yeah, that and the threat of not getting a spot on Bigbang’s Australian tour later this year.”

“Well, at least they’re getting it fixed,” Lisa retorted. “Teetering on the edge of the stage with nothing below me but a concrete floor and a handful of drunk Australians isn’t an experience I want to ever have again.”

During this conversation, Rosé had pulled out her phone and texted Ms Lee: “Plz call 2nd club. Head still hurts from hair ripped out by splintery stage.”

When they arrived at the airport, Jisoo looked around to see who was going to be her airport buddy. She was pleased and surprised to see that it as Lisa again - she almost never got the same airport buddy twice.

“Didn’t anybody tell you?” Lisa said in response to the confused look on Jisoo’s face. “Jennie and Rosé and I talked about it while you were arranging for our breakfast this morning. As long as I’m there, I’m your airport buddy. You’re my girl, so it’s my responsibility to get you safely onto the plane.”

Jisoo was already clinging to one of Lisa’s arms, but that still left one arm for the taller girl to reach across and give her a hug. Lisa had never felt so safe in an airport.

* * * * * *

By the time their plane had arrived in Seoul, they were all ready to get home, get a shower, and get into bed. A dispute over who’d get to shower first was starting to get heated, each girl sure she had the best reason for getting to go first, until Rosé pulled out a deck of cards and had them draw cards for their showering order. (As it turned out, Lisa got to go first, then Rosé, then Jennie, then Jisoo.)

When the car dropped them off at the YG dormitories, they went up to their apartment and were surprised to see a large bouquet sitting on the ground outside their door. Rosé picked it up and looked at the card. “It’s for Jisoo,” she said, handing the flowers over.

Once they’d gotten inside and Jisoo had found a vase to put the flowers in and give them some water, she finally opened to card.

“About time,” Jennie said. “Were you trying to kill us with anticipation?”

Rosé shushed her. “Shhhhh. Let her read it.”

Having already read the card to herself, Jisoo took a deep breath and read aloud:

Dear Jisoo,  
I heard about the Australia tour and I wish you continued success. You’ve earned it.  
Devotedly yours,  
A Big Fan

“Oooooh! Jisoo’s got a secret admirer!” Jennie laughed. “Lisa had better watch out.”

Lisa came out of the shower just in time to hear the end of this. “Lisa had better watch out for what?”

Jisoo handed her the card and let her read it for herself. As she handed the card back, Lisa said “I don’t recognize the handwriting. You?”

Jisoo said she didn’t recognize it, and after being shown the card, Jennie and Rosé didn’t recognize it either. Then Rosé pointed out that if the flowers were ordered by phone or online, then the card would have been written by the florist.

“So we’re no closer to solving the mystery than we were before,” Lisa groused.

“I don’t know that we need to solve it,” Jisoo responded, leaning forward to kiss her girlfriend on the nose. “I think it’s fun having a little mystery around.”

Lisa looked slightly less than convinced, but she did agree that they were beautiful flowers.

* * * * * *

On evenings when they didn’t have anything else going on, Lisa would go to a coffee shop near their dorm and hang out for a while. She’d drink a pot of tea while people-watching and sketching. The staff at the coffee shop knew Lisa and were very protective of her: They’d always, no matter how crowded the place was, find her a table with a good view of the people going by that was likewise within view of the barista’s station so they could keep an eye on her and intervene if anyone tried to bother her. They needn’t have bothered, though: the coffee shop was near enough to the YG complex that the people were used to seeing stars out and about and it would take someone a lot bigger than a rookie - even a monster rookie - to get them to stop and take notice. And even if they did take notice, they were too well-mannered to do anything - one evening she’d even seen Bigbang’s TOP and Taeyang come in for coffee to go and no one had taken it as anything out of the ordinary. They’d stopped by Lisa’s table to chat for a minute, then went on their way. This was probably one of the few coffee shops in the country where they could count on just being treated like ordinary people.

Consequently, Lisa was rather surprised when a woman about her age, perhaps slightly older, in a dark grey business suit came over and sat down at her table.

“Hello,” the woman said, “I hope you won’t think me too forward. My name’s Lilith and I just moved to this area, so I don’t know anyone around here yet. I’ve seen you in her drawing several nights this week, and I was hoping one of these night I’ve have a chance to introduce myself.”

Before the woman got any further than this, Do-hyun, one of the barristas, was at Lisa’s side. “Is everything all right, Ms Manoban? Do you need anything?”

“Everything’s fine,” Lisa said. “I was just chatting with my new friend,” (slight emphasis on the “new”) “Lilith. If I could get another pot of tea, and a cup and saucer for Lilith, that would be fine. If I find I need anything else, I’ll be sure to let you know.”

“Well,” Lilith said. “does everyone here get such excellent service, or does one have to do something special. Know the owner, maybe?”

“Oh, no, nothing like that,” Lisa said. “It’s just that being so close to the YG compound they get a lot of celebrities in here, and so they’re very protective of our privacy, knowing how invasive some fans can be.”

“Celebrities? Do you mean to say you’re famous?”

Lisa was stunned - she couldn’t remember the last time she’d met someone who hadn’t already known who she was. It was kind of refreshing. “Have you ever heard of the girl group Blackpink? I’m Lisa Manoban, one of the members.”

“I think I may have heard one of my assistants mention Blackpink, but to be honest, I don’t follow music. Haven’t since I was a little girl.”

Lisa was kind of stunned by this - music had been such a large part of her life for as long as she could remember that she couldn’t imagine someone having absolutely no interest in music. “One of your assistants? What do you do that you’re around my age and have multiple assistants?”

Lilith laughed. “Nothing so interesting as being a pop star, I’m afraid. I did an early graduation from business school and now I’m a junior executive at a pharmaceutical company.”

The conversation continued in this was for quite some time, Lisa thoroughly enjoying having a chance to talk with someone who wasn’t involved with - and seemingly had no interest in - the music industry. When she happened to notice the time, it was after dark and well past the time that she usually went back to the dorm.

“I’ve really enjoyed talking with you,” she said to Lilith as she put away her drawing supplies. I’m usually in here several nights a week. Feel free to join me if you see me.”

Do-hyun offered to call her a cab, but she insisted that she could walk back to the dorm safely. He made her carry her phone in her hand, and promise to call the police at the first sign of anything that might turn into danger, and he watched her from the time she left the coffee shop until she turned the corner and was out of sight. Lilith stayed a few minutes longer, finishing her cup of tea, then called a taxi to take her back to her apartment.

* * * * * *

Lisa made it safely back to their apartment, eager to tell her bandmates about the new friend she’d made tonight, this strange woman who worked for a drug company and had no interest in music. But she arrived to find that another mystery had preceeded her there. Just as the first bouquet was starting to wilt, a second one had arrived, with a note reading

Dear Jisoo,  
I saw you on Inkigayo last night. That dress you were wearing was so cute! Keep up the good work.  
Devotedly yours,  
A Big Fan

“That’s crossing the line,” Lisa said, looking suspiciously at the bouquet as if she expected the flowers to suddenly attack them. “I’m calling Ms Lee and telling her about this.”

No, don’t,” Jisoo said. “I don’t think it’s anything dangerous; just a somewhat overly devoted fan.” As Lisa opened her mouth to protest, Jisoo cut her off. “If I get another bouquet after this one, I’ll call Ms Lee myself, okay? In the meantime, just let me enjoy them - I’m almost never the one to get gifts from fans.”

Lisa was about to protest anyway, but once she saw how happy Jisoo was looking at the flowers, she relented, and made a mental note to buy Jisoo some flowers herself. After a short chat about the day’s events and a review of the upcoming day’s schedule, they all headed off to bed. Lisa realized as she drifted off to sleep that in the excitement over the second bouquet, she’d forgotten to tell everyone about Lilith. “That can wait,” she thought to herself. “A friendly woman in a coffee shop is far less urgent to deal with than a potential stalker.” Despite Jisoo’s repeated reassurances, Lisa was still not entirely convinced that whoever was sending these flowers was entirely harmless.


	8. Conclusion

As the date of Blackpink's next comeback drifted further and further into the future, their lives fell into a sort of strange holding pattern. Practice every day, along with public appearance whenever they could be arranged. Recording sessions from time to time. But mainly lots and lots of waiting. Several nights a week Lisa would go to the coffee shop and draw. Maybe once a week Lilith would meet her there and they'd chat while Lisa drew.

Lisa tried to get Jisoo to come with her, but Jisoo always refused, saying it was important for Lisa to have a place that was just hers. Likewise she tried to get Lilith to come to the apartment and meet the rest of the band, but Lilith alwawys refused, citing some excuse or other. It was kind of nice but also kind of frustrating having these two parts of her life that touched but never met.

When Blackpink House was announced, Lisa couldn't wait to tell Lilith.

"Oh, I don't usually watch TV, but I'll try to look in on it," Lilith said. "It sounds very exciting for you, though."

As the time for filming to begin got closer, Lilith began asking Lisa for the address at Blackpink House.

"We're not supposed to tell anyone," Lisa would say.

"But I'm not going to tell anyone," Lilith would say. "I couldn't - I don't even know anyone who matters in your world. I just want to be able to send you a Christmas card. Cross my heart. Surely you don't think I'm going to show up at the house and risk interrupting your filming!"

Finally her explanations wore down Lisa's resistance; she handed over the address, after extracting a solemn promise not to share the address with anyone - not even her assistants.

^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^

As the day approached for the start of filming, the members were all asked for contact information for their friends and family who might be able to be part of the show. Most of their friends were eliminated right away, being in bands on other labels. Lisa submitted her parents and Lilith. She thought it would give her quiet friend a thrill to be part of a television show.

At one of the preproduction meetings, YG had Lisa stay behind so he could talk to her privately.

"I went over your friends and family list," he said. "The friend you submitted is unacceptable. In fact, I would prefer-" and Lisa knew exactly what these words really meant- "that you not associate with this person. I've really got nothing more to say; just trust me on this."

The next day was move-in day. Lisa was so excited that she didn't think about Lilith all day. When she did think about her, as she was drifting off to sleep, she hoped that Lilith would keep her word and only use the address to send her a Christmas card, and maybe even not for that. She hoped Lilith would forget about her - it would be easier to just not see her again than to see her again than to have to explain that she wasn't allowed to associate with her anymore.

Several days later, Lisa answered the doorbell to discover a bouquet of flowers left outside. She gathered all the members together before she opened the card, thinking it was a new quest and part of the show.

"Oh, these are beautiful!" Rosé said as she put the flowers in a vase.

"Oh no," Lisa said as she read the card.

Jennie took the card out of her hand and read it aloud:

"Jisoo,

Congratulations on starting to film your TV show.

A Big Fan"

Lisa looked at Jisoo. "Do you want to call Ms. Lee, or do you want me to do it for you?"

Jisoo looked stunned. "Do we have to tell her? I mean, since they found us here, they must be someone who works for YG. I wouldn't want them to lose their job because they were too big of a fan."

"But we don't know that it's someone who works for YG," Lisa protested. "If they're a big stalker, they could have just watched where we went on move-in day, then wrote down the address on the mailbox."

"At any rate," Jennie said, "Ms Lee's going to know about this no matter what we do, and so is YG - you just had this whole conversation in front of about a dozen cameras and microphones.

"See?" Jisoo said. "We don't have to do anything after all - they already know about it and they'll take care of it."

"I guess you're right, technically," Lisa said, "but you're still kind of weaseling out. You promised me you'd report it if you got another bouquet from this 'Big Fan'."

"OK," Rosé said, heading off an argument. "It's taken care of. Let's just drop it."

^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^

When they got back Thailand, there was another bouquet waiting for them. They made a point of reading the card in front of the cameras and even held the card up to one of the cameras so YG could see what it said. They were all kind of freaked out - how had this person known when they'd be coming back. Rosé kept getting up from the sofa and going to look out the window.

After about half a dozen times of this, Jennie asked "What do you see out there? Or are you just trying to make us all more paranoid?"

"There's a woman in a grey coat on the sidewalk across the street, looking at the house. She hasn't moved in the past hour.

Lisa was the first one to the window. As soon as Rosé pointed out the woman, a look of recognition came over her face. "It's my friend Lilith! The one I've told you all about, from the coffee shop!"

By this time Jisoo had made it to the window. As soon as she saw the woman, all the color rushed from her face. "Oh my God!" she said. "Lisa, this is your friend from the coffee shop? The one you've been trying to get me to meet?"

"Yeah," Lisa said. "Why? You look like you've just seen a ghost."

"That's Lily," Jisoo said. "I'd recognize her anywhere."

"YG said he'd prefer for me not to be friends with her anymore..." Lisa said, her voice trailing off.

"And now you know why," Jisoo added. She started heading for the door.

"Where are you going?" Jennie asked.

"I have to talk to her, get her to leave us alone," Jisoo said as she slipped on her shoes and struggled with her jacket.

"Wait, I'll come with you," Lisa said.

"No," Jisoo said. "This is something I have to do alone."

"But..." Lisa started to protest, but a look from Jisoo silenced her. "OK," she finally said, "but I'll be watching from up here. If she so much as lays a finger on you, I'll be down there."

"We all will," Jennie said.

Jisoo nodded. "OK. This shouldn't take long."

Jisoo stopped in the middle of the yard, looked up at her members and waved, then turned and walked through the gate. "Lily," she called out.

The woman started to run, but Jisoo fixed her with a stare. "Lily, we have to talk."

"I... I can't... I can't believe it's actually you after all this time."

Jisoo nodded and crossed the street to stand next to Lily. "It's me. And it's you. You look good."

Lily made a show of looking Jisoo up and down. "Well you look great! I remember the first time I saw you on TV - I'd been sure you were going to make it, but to actually see it happen sent chills down my spine."

"And so you started stalking me," Jisoo said.

"I had to," Lily said. "YG would never let us be together, not after what he did."

"We still can't be together," Jisoo said.

"Well, of course not," Lily said, "but soon the filming will be over and you won't be surrounded cameras all the time."

"No, Lily," Jisoo said. "We can't be together. You need to go on with your life, without me. I kept my promise to you - I studied my ass off and I made it. But in order to do that, I had to turn off my capacity to love. It's not until recently that someone broke down the walls that I'd put up. For the first time since you left, I love someone, and she loves me. I'm happy, Lily, and now I'm begging you to go be happy too."

"But... but I waited for you! All this time!" Tears started to glisten in Lily's eyes.

Jisoo shook her head. "You shouldn't have, Lily, and it's not fair for you to expect me to have."

"But..."

"No, Lily. It was good to see you, but this is the last time. You know YG will have you arrested if you come around again." She reached out and awkwardly patted Lily on the arm. "Take care of yourself. I'm glad you're okay."

Jisoo turned and walked back across the street to Blackpink House.

"It's Lisa, isn't it?" Lily called after her.

"Goodbye Lily," Jisoo said without turning around. "Don't make this harder than it already is."

Jisoo went through the gate into the yard of Blackpink House. She shut the gate behind her, and when she turned back to the house, Lisa was standing in the doorway waiting for her. She smiled, wiped away a stray tear, and went inside.


End file.
